Psst! Hey Shawty! and all my other "Names"

One of the most annoying things for me and I'm sure any other beautiful woman (Oh, how conceited of me!) is cat calls or being picked up by strange men in the street. I don't know about other women but for me its always a guy that just seems like a real bum! The guys who think wife beaters and saggy jeans with their boxers showing are some kind of uniform; unkepmt guys with shaggy beady bead beards (think Pam from "Martin") and bad breath; males who are in men bodies but act like little boys...Yea, these are the kind of guys I always seem to get. And then they do the worst things to get your attention. They will call out for you from across the street. They will slow their beat up cars down and try to get you to hop in. And a lot of them just say really rude and objectifying things to you like "Damn, Baby! You look like a steak meal with a side of potatoes and corn on the cob!"

Some guys are really shameless, I swear! And what makes me mad is that some of us women accept craziness like that and these guys end up with girlfriends (or jumpoffs depending on the situation). Me personally, I have never and will never date a guy like that trying to "holla" at me on the street. But I have done some funny things to try to avoid them like giving a fake name, giving old numbers that have been disconnected, pretending to be hard of hearing, wearing fake engagement rings and wedding bands, and my favorite; pretending to be a lesbian!

Obviously there are better ways to try to pick up women; not every guy uses these bummy moves. There are the few guys out there that will just simply try to strike up a conversation or tell you that you look beautiful, which is a whole lot better than "Yo Shawty" or "Hey You in the *insert color here*!" I never knew I went by so many names!

If you agree or have a funny story about a guy (or girl) trying to pick you up, leave it in the comment section below and as always, Thanks for Reading!

P.S.: This post is not meant to be mean or hurt anyones feelings, just being funny! Don't worry if you're a girl that's fallen for the "Hey Shawty" technique, I'm sure you're not the only one ;-)

I Support LOVE!

The news has been buzzing lately with talks that legalizing gay marriage just might be coming to the great state of New York and I couldn't be happier to hear this news!

I'm not gay myself but like the title of this posts says: I support love and I support gay marriage because denying someone the right to express their love in the way that they want to is just wrong. You can ask any of my close friends and family; I've always been very passionate about the rights of the LGBT community and whenever I hear about the mistreatment, prejudice, and injustice they face, I am so disgusted.

Why is it so wrong for LGBT to just be themselves? Are they hurting anybody? No! Everyone in this world should be able to love who they want to without fear if being outcast by others.

I'm not knocking anybody who doesn't believe in gay marriage. Whatever, that's your prerogative and I wouldn't tell anyone what to believe or how to feel. But as soon as you express that in a hateful way, that's when you need to be shut down! The bullying NEEDS TO STOP, the bashing NEEDS TO STOP, the slurs and hurtful words NEED TO STOP!!! Come on people, we're living in the new millenium for God's sake! And speaking of God, MY God wants us to love and respect everyone as we would want to be loved and respected because that's how much he loves us. I don't know what YOUR God tells you to do but eh...

Anyway, on a lighter and funnier note, I used to be sooo in love with Lance Bass from NSYNC. I mean I used to dream about marrying him and having some really pretty half black kids with blonde hair lol (this was of course before he came out as a gay man...well before-ish). When he came out I was so proud and happy for him and I knew that he was going to be a positive role model and influence the lives of so many. If I had to pick my favorite gay person he would be it lol.
Don't know why I told that story! I guess it's slightly related. It'll be more related if Lance gets married in NY!! (*Crossing my fingers*)

How do you feel about gay marriage coming to NY? Leave your comment below and Thanks for reading!

Jealousy: Lemme Break it Down for Ya!

Picture Credit: soc.ucsb.edu


Jealousy is way up there on the list of things that can ruin a relationship. Over the years, I've come to my own theories about what I think are the three types or levels of jealousy.
***Disclaimer: I am not a psychologist or relationship expert. I only have my opinions and whether you agree or not is up to you.

The first type of jealousy is the healthiest one. When you're in a loving relationship, there should be some degree of jealousy in which you're possessive (but not excessively) over your partner. I'm gonna use a hypothetical situation to explain my point better.

You and your boyfriend (or girlfriend) are sitting in a restaurant when the waitress (or waiter) stops by to take your order. The waitress is really good looking and you see your boyfriend and her exchanging (what you think are) inappropriate looks. He's checking her out and she's checking him out and you're watching the whole thing. Now a "healthy jealous" attitude would be to just put your arm around your man and flash the girl a fierce but friendly look that says "He's all mine, sorry!" And then move it along. That's a reasonable reaction to a situation where one might be jealous. It shows that you are confident that although your partner is noticing someone else and vice versa, there's no need to flip because YOU GOT THIS!!!

Take that same situation. You're sitting at the table, the waitress comes, blah blah. Now in the next level of jealousy, you would immediately get upset. All these negative thoughts would run through your head for a while and it'll just bring you down. This level of jealous stems from insecurity. But what makes this type of jealousy not as bad as the next one I'm gonna mention, is that you don't act on those thoughts…at least not in a crazy way. The most you would do with this type of jealousy is be in a bad mood and psych yourself out into being upset and passive aggressive while your partner is wondering what he/she did wrong. But the upside to this level of jealousy is that sometimes you can be secure enough to talk yourself out of this feeling. You can think of the fact that your boyfriend is there with YOU on that date and no one else. Yes, he might notice other women but he still choses to be with you.

Now for the final level of jealousy; the type that is fear inducing; the crazy jealousy. Same situation: You, your boyfriend, the waitress at the table, looks are exchanged, etc. The crazy jealous girlfriend would immediately go into bitch mode; flip out and accuse both the boyfriend and the waitress of messing around behind her back. She would fight the waitress and key up her boyfriend's car. This is the extreme level of jealousy. It comes from insecurity, irrationality, and bad relationships period. If you're a man or a woman and you feel the need to react to simple situations in a drastic way like this then perhaps you should check yourself out. I mean there are many factors that would cause a person to react that way. And sometimes it’s the other person in the relationship that can drive a person crazy like that… #ImJustSayin!

Hope you enjoyed this post! Feel free to give feedback, even if you disagree and Thanks for Reading!!!

The L Word (And no I don't mean the TV show)

I was having a conversation with someone a couple weeks ago about Love. How do you know when you're in it?  And after you finally figure out that you're in love, how do you know when you're ready to settle down?  How do you know of your significant other is "the one"?

I think these are most baffling of questions in life. These questions are the reasons we as people go crazy in relationships!  The jealousy, cheating, lying, conniving, trickery, passive aggression...those things can all be attributed to the fact that we don't know where were going and who were going there with.  I think even the seemingly happiest couples are probably just as unsure as someone who's struggling to find love.

I guess the point of love and life is that you'll never know what you're destined for or who you're destined to be with. There are people who find the loves of their lives at the ends of their lives and people who don't believe in soul mates but instead believe in loving the one you're with. But in the end, I think we can all agree that despite the hardships, difficulties and searching, being in love or even thinking you're in love makes it all worth it and if you don't quite agree with that, maybe you haven't had that kind of love yet.

Thanks for reading!  

"Love me or Leave me, Just take it or Leave it...."

Me, Fresh faced and Make-up free

Ladies this one is for you...
I am guilty of having this thought---> 'He (whomever he may be) cannot see me without my make-up on or my hair 'did'!" and I'm also guilty of saying this---> "No, you can't come over now, I need at least an hour to get ready" I think we've all had these thoughts when it comes to our romantic relationships. Today I kind of realized just how silly it all is. I know someone who emailed a person she's newly dating a picture of herself without makeup so that he could, quote, "know what he was getting himself into." But now she's worried because she hasn't heard back from him yet and she fears she may have scared him off.

Now here's my problem with that scenario; why does he need a preview? Why even give him a reason to reject you or walk away? Why put him through a "test"? It will happen eventually; that guy you're seeing now WILL eventually see you not looking your best. I say, just let fate take over and wait for the actual moment to happen before you force it. And besides, why do we women do these things when Men will fart, burp, spit in front of us, hang their guts freely over their bellies and scratch their crotches without batting an eye?

Just something to think about. Thanks for reading!



***Title consists of lyrics from "I Am" by Christina Aguilera: Bionic album